What To Do When Feeling Anxious

Introduction

In this article I will start by outlining a 3 step process to follow whenever you are anxious particularly if you get a panic attack. First: Stop… pause…take some deep breaths. Second: Become aware of your surroundings. Thirdly, check in with yourself to discover what’s causing your anxiety. I will then discuss the importance of identifying possible triggers of your anxiety. Finally I will outline how exercise, mindfulness and counselling can help to manage and even heal the condition.

Deep Breathing: STOP! Pause; take a few breaths deep into the stomach in the following manner: Close your mouth and breathe only through your nose; count to 4 on the inhale as you experience your whole torso down to your guts slowly expanding; then pause your breath to the count of 3; and finally exhale to the count of 5 (the exhale is longer than the inhale) as you notice your torso slowly deflating.

Orientation and Relaxation: When you orientate you become aware of your surroundings. You bring yourself into the here and now, into the present moment. If inside, look around you and note the main features of the room you are in. Touch some objects in the room. Ground your feet against the floor and your back against the chair. Be aware of your breathing and body sensations. If outside, look around you. Notice all the sights, sounds and smells your senses can take in.

One useful orientation exercise is the 5 senses grounding technique – in the here and now just be aware of 5 things you see; 4 things you hear; 3 things you sense in your body; 2 things you smell and 1 things you taste now in your month. This use of the various senses will slowly calm you down and relax you.

Check In with Yourself: Now that the panicky edge of the anxiety has died down, you should check in with yourself. Take time to notice the negative thoughts, feelings, body sensations and instincts that are driving it. Anxiety is driven by negative thoughts and feelings gone out of control. To manage these anxious thoughts and feelings, it’s best to bypass the mind and get into your body. The German Psychologist Fritz Pearl advised his clients to “lose your mind and come to your senses”. It’s particularly helpful in anxious conditions to get out of your head and into your body and its sensations.

The body keeps the score. The ups and downs of our lives are imprinted in our bodies. The effects of our anxiety too are imprinted in some or various parts of the body. Our language is full of phrases which point to how we embody our thoughts and feelings. Here are some examples:

Stomach area: ‘butterflies in my stomach’, ‘all tied up in knots’ ‘twisted inside’ ‘cannot swallow or stomach something’, ‘belly laugh’ ‘feeling warm in my belly’

Heart: ‘heartache’, ‘broken hearted’, ‘heavy hearted’, ‘light hearted’ and ‘open hearted’

Shoulders/Neck: ‘he’s a pain in the neck’, ‘that’s a weight off my shoulders’.

The mere conscious awareness of these tensions and reactions often helps to start taking the edge off the anxiety. If you focus and concentrate on the sensations, often the sensations will change relaxing you even further. When given due loving attention and left to its own devices, the body will naturally self-regulate and establish calm and equilibrium. With this calmer more relaxed body you will more easily recognise the negative thoughts, feelings, instincts and behaviours that have been driving your anxiety. More importantly with this calmer mind and body you will gain the wisdom, confidence and self-control to establish healthier thoughts, feelings and behaviours.

Triggers

What or when are the times when you are more likely to get anxious? What thoughts or images typically initiate your concerns? If you can see the patterns, then maybe you can do something about those situations, and do something different. Certain times and places? Certain people? Certain things? Now think ahead about these situations and plan new ways of responding.

Exercise

Many of the adverse effects of the body’s anxious adrenaline response can be used up healthily in physical exercise.   Go for a walk, run, cycle or swim, or do some gardening or housework. A key ingredient is to pick the exercise(s) you enjoy the most. Practising the exercise in the great outdoors particularly in mountains, forests and seas brings so much added value to the exercise.

Mindfulness

The practice of mindfulness and other forms of meditation helps to develop greater self- awareness of your thoughts, feelings and sensations. You Tube is an excellent resource for brief 5, 10 and 20 minute guided meditations which are good introductions to the practice of mindfulness. Many of the elements of my 3 stage response when anxiety strikes are to be found in meditation practices which encourage deep breathing, coming into the present moment and getting in touch with your thoughts, feelings and senses. 

Counselling

‘No man is an island’. Growing self-awareness is at the heart of the work of healing from anxiety. It takes courage and perseverance to get to the root of our anxieties. Very few can do this work alone. A good counsellor will help clients to recognise the thoughts, feelings and body sensations which sustain and maintain their anxieties. With a good counsellor, clients gradually develop the capacity to question and modify their thoughts, feelings and sensations. This growing self-awareness leads to more healing and the capacity to make the necessary behavioural changes to live the life they really want to live.